From the beginning of this whole journey I had planned to blog about the process. I wanted it to serve as both a record for myself, a way for my friends to be kept in the loop with what I was up to and as an information source for others who might have never heard of this surgery and would greatly benefit from it.
But then life got in the way.
At first I was busy at work and preparing to finish up and then I enjoyed my time off just doing what I pleased.
Then as the days ticked over and I still hadn’t started my blog it all seemed too daunting. For the entire time I have been taking notes and writing bits and pieces but I hadn’t properly started and it all seemed too huge. The more days went by, the more daunting it seemed to be able to start.
If I am honest I was also nervous that no one would be interested in what I had to say or that I wouldn’t be able to write in an entertaining way.
The fear of failing weighed heavy around my neck and paralyzed me whenever I my fingers touched the keyboard.
As a somewhat perfectionist this has long been a common theme with me. Often I will be too afraid of something not living up to the expectation I establish in my mind that I simply cannot start.
So concerned with failing I end up failing before I even start.
The longer it went the worse I felt about myself, about not starting. I felt lazy and useless and the more people asked about my blog the guiltier I felt.
I wanted this blog, this story, to be honest and that in itself scared me half to death. For years I have never spoken much about my leg and suddenly for it to be in the spotlight has taken some getting used to.
Then I had my surgery and while I continued to take notes in the weeks after I wasn’t quite up to big slabs of writing.
But I knew this was important to both myself and to others and so three weeks ago I bit the bullet and started writing.
It turns out I have a lot more to say that I had previously thought.
So after three weeks filled with days of solid writing, more than 50 posts and nearly 30,000 words, here we are.
Since I have posted these all a little late the dates don’t really match the real time so I hope you can look past this. However, posts still appear in chronological order so please don’t feel too cheated.
So yes, it’s a little delayed but better late then never right?
I promise from now on I will keep on top of things and update regularly.
And so this is my story. I hope you enjoy it.
The Girl With The Cyborg Leg